It's like picking at a scab and opening up the wound over and over again. Mostly because you're curious, sometimes because it's ugly and you childishly pick it off to get rid of it only to have it bleed for a little then scab and get ugly again. 

And it just sits there, a gross set of bumps on your skin, and it's so easy, tempting even, to touch it, see if it's healed over underneath... just a little glimpse, promise. But it's not. It's still pretty ugly underneath, and now you've only succeeded in making it raw and open again.

It never really gets worse, but it doesn't get better either unless you leave it the fuck alone. I should know better by now.